I love you Grandma

As a child one of my wishes was that all my friends and family would die at the same time so I wouldn’t have to deal with the pain of death. Now a little older I realize that wasn’t a very reasonable wish.

For the past month or so I’ve been back home in Minnesota helping my family take care of my Grandma who was recently diagnosed with cancer and given six weeks to live.

Last week I had to face that fear of death when my Grandma left us for a better place.

It was the hardest, but also the most rewarding experience of my life and brought me closer to her and my family. For that I can’t thank my Grandma enough. Actually I can’t thank her enough for everyone she’s done in her life for me. My Grandma would always tell us in the last weeks she was hassle. We’d always remind her that she wasn’t. My Grandma, no matter her condition, took care of us more than we took care of her. She was by far the strongest woman I knew in all facets of life. This was a woman who pitched so many hay bales in her life that her first wedding ring split in half from all the friction of the baling twine rubbing against her ring.

In the weeks that I was with my Grandma I realized there’s a lot more to experiencing life than being behind a camera. With no camera to mask my feelings the tears flowed freely, my heart weeped openly and my appreciation for just living grew immensly. No worrying about color, light, or composition. Only moments mattered. Precious and priceless time spent with my Grandma.

Every minute did really matter and needed to be cherished as such.

For far too long I’ve taken for granted the simple act of loving and living. Cherish those you love. They’re what matter in life.

Here’s a little something I read or tried to read at my Grandma’s funeral:

Grandma I love you

Thank you for all you shared
Thank you for all your care

Grandma I’ll miss you

Although my heart fills with tears
Your strength reminds me that there’s nothing to fear

Grandma I love you

Grandma I’d tell you it’s not fair
You told me it’s all in God’s prayers

Grandma I’ll miss you

Grandma I’ll never forget laying at your side
You lived life with God as your guide

Grandma I’ll miss you

Grandma your quilt reminds me of your tender touch
And it’ll keep me forever wrapped in your love

Grandma I love you.

Grandma I’ll never forget our last moments together
Me calling upon the power of prayer and you telling me not to fear

Grandma I’ll miss you

Grandma thanks for the note you left I cried as I read the words you wrote
I’ll miss you too and can’t wait to see you in heaven

Grandma I miss you and I love you


Grandma’s gentle touch will forever be my guide.
Photo by: Jenn

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6 Responses to “I love you Grandma”

  1. Robert Woolley Says:
    April 21st, 2008 at 11:24 pm

    I’m sorry for your loss, but I am glad that she passed with such admiration from her family who each carried a wonderful appreciation of her life. I think that is what we most wish for when it’s our time to pass on, and it’s beautiful that you were there for her.

  2. trent Says:
    April 22nd, 2008 at 1:43 am

    sure sucks. my thoughts are with you.
    -trent

  3. Mike Says:
    April 22nd, 2008 at 8:39 pm

    Hey Tim,
    We were very sorry to here about your Grandmother. She sounded like a wonderful person. We are thinking of you and your family and wishing you well.

    Mike and Sherry

  4. Tim Gruber Says:
    April 23rd, 2008 at 8:32 pm

    Robert, Trent, Mike and Sherry,

    Thanks for the support.

    You’re right Robert I was glad I was able to be there with her. It’ll be one of those things that’ll always look back upon fondly.

  5. Kainaz Amaria Says:
    April 23rd, 2008 at 11:05 pm

    hey grubes,
    my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. been thinking about callin’ but thought i’d wait a bit. take care.
    much love.
    kainaz

  6. Tim Gruber Says:
    April 24th, 2008 at 3:16 pm

    Thanks Kainaz.

    Hopefully things are going well down there? I’m hoping I can make it back at some point. Keep Dove in line for me.

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